Confession Tuesday - Over-thinking Edition

Dear Reader,

It's been a week since my last confession. A week and 7 morning pages. Follow me to the box and let's begin.

I confess that sometimes this past week I've woken up in the wee hours of the morning and had trouble getting back to sleep. This might not be so annoying if in fact I was getting to sleep at a decent hour.  Lately unsettled dogs in the house have set me back for starters and on occasion (but not always) they are the reason for waking prematurely. This is compounded by the fact that office work has been so intense lately that I come home exhausted to start with. The other day in spite of being awake at 3 A.M. I was able to get back to sleep and have some wildly eventful dreams after falling back to sleep. This tells me in hit REM and that's good sleeping.

Getting back to morning pages, I confess that starting the Artist's Way has revealed some interesting things to me. If you are not familiar with morning pages they are written about anything and everything that comes into your mind. They are like stream of conscious writing. This flushing out of the mind each day is not to shared with anyone else or even reread for a period of time so I will not go into detail.  In fact I can't necessarily recall everything I've written but I will confess that their are some things that have been revealed to me that challenge some of my habits and thinking. Since one of the things in the book that I read in advance of week one suggests there are things we might feel uncomfortable about I can attest that this is already happening. But this is a good thing, right?

I confess that I will hit what my wife said the kids called a milestone birthday on Thursday. No, I'm not turning 100. I don't think of birthday's as milestones except maybe 100. Milestones in years are like years on the job or number of years married. Those are milestones. I confess the only thing worse then turning my age would be NOT turning my age. Does that make sense?

I confess that I subscribed to Duotrope. I'm hope subscription price will shame me in to submitting more work.  I didn't do bad last year but I'm hopeful that 2013 will be a robust year for both submissions and acceptances.

The other day I began pondering if I should dump the name of this blog. I've blogged here under the name Stickpoet since 2003 if my memory serves me correctly. (I could look at my first date in the archives if I was not too lazy) I liked the sort of comic identity but have recently wondered if it's unbecoming.  Too silly to be seen seriously. Do I even care to be taken seriously? Of course I want my work to be taken seriously.  I confess this may be over-thinking. I sometimes do that. I think it's a Capricorn thing.

Can I get an Amen?

175 Of Them!

Across the street from my home is a large field with a baseball diamond. (an added bonus when we looked at the house) I've knocked around some fly balls in it and played catch. Not as often as I'd like to have but even knowing it's there is still a cheap thrill.

I enjoy it when others use the field for baseball or just to practice. Not so much for soccer or football practice. Some things are sacred. But each year I do enjoy the return of the geese. To the geese I always extend a hearty welcome.

Sometimes there are 30 to 40 that arrive. Other times there are in excess of 100. This weekend I thought the number exceptionally high and I began to count. They are really not hard to count because they will stand still for me for the most part Spread out over the field there were 175 that I counted. Now I may be off + or - 1 or 2 but I'd say no more. So for the sake of this reporting I will go with the 175 number and it established a new high count.

Thinking about the geese there are a couple of things right off that I like about them. For starters the fact that they return a couple of different period of time during the year. I like that they come back to where they know.

I also appreciate that when they are walking around they seem to be doing their own thing. The are individuals. But they also belong to a larger community. When they go and come it is together. And they will fly off in a beautiful formation once aloft... Their aerodynamics is something to behold.; and they know their leader. There is no bickering among them as to who is to lead. This may of course occur in private smoke filled rooms but they do not air their dirty laundry or do political backstabbing in plain view and I appreciate that about them.

They have blessed me with a return again this winter and for that I am thankful.

  

Confession Tuesday - Tardy Edition

Dear Reader,
I'm late. Yes I'm starting this out nearly an hour into Wednesday.  I confess that it had not occurred to me that it was Tuesday in spite of answering my wife's question as to what day it was esrlier in the eveving.  It's like I knew without it ever really registering.

My mind has apparently been on break from reality. Reality is so overrated.

I confess that in the morning I will of course meet the sun with a different perspective but I confess I will not be s willing participant in this.

Even on holidays or other days off I don't generally find it easy to lose myself in the moment. I confess that I did tonight and I liked it.

Amen!

Making The Artist's Way Commitment

I'm committing this month to undertake The Artist's Way in order to better connect with the artist that is within me, to explore it, to listen to it, nurture it, grow it and realize the potential that is there, often overlooked or hindered. 

The Artist's Way - Wikipedia

I understand  that I am undertaking an intensive, guided encounter with my own creativity. I commit myself to the twelve week duration of the course. 

I commit to weekly reading, daily morning pages, a weekly artist date, and the fulfillment of each week's tasks.

I further understand that this course will raise issues and emotions for me to deal with. I commit myself to excellent self-care, adequate sleep, diet, exercise and pampering for the duration of the course.


Michael A. Wells
January 1, 2013

Hello 2013 - Can You Hear Me Now?

I saw this "wordcandy.me" image today and thought it was perhaps speaking to me because I have been planning to start The Artist's Way now for several months and I've decided to make the jump into it  straight away as the new year gets underway.

There is a undercurrent that is bubbling on a low simmer within me that wants to be something grander. I have felt it and maybe it's fear, or not knowing what to do next, of being too fractured in my thinking but there is something that has allowed me to go only so far that year that we are ending. Perhaps I want not supposed to go any further. Maybe I was supposed to find myself right were I am at the end of this year on a slow burn (knowing something different was ahead in my writing) and awaiting the next phase.

I spent another fall working with a poet on some things and again I found myself feeling growth in my work and again finding inspiration. As a coach and mentor this poet has a way of bringing about transformative awareness in where you are and helping you step out of that place and move ahead.  I have to credit this low simmer as a part of that - telling me that what's cooking is something different and that I need to be ready to turn up the burner a bit and let new things happen.

So that is in this new horizon for 2013 is not in clear focus but I have some ideas. I've had ideas before and for one or more reasons this ideas have only gone so far. I've been experienced in finding one road block after another on paths here and there. 2012 has provided me with some successes for sure. I have a lot to be thankful for, but I'm not getting any younger and I've never felt that time was on my side. I do want to turn the burner up a bit and move ahead; I want to reach what is on that horizon and not feel like I'm swimming in an ocean after a point that never gets any closer.

HELLO 2013 -  CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?

Mail Bag

Some days it's better to get no mail then the alternative if that's bills. Today was a really good day...
1. Copy of Poets & Writers magazine.
2. Check for work published.
3. Card from another poet.
4. Rumpus letter from author Elizabeth Crane.

Not a single bill!

- Happy poet

GlassFire Magazine - Winter 2012 Issue

Winter issue is out along with my poem PRONOUNS

GlassFire Magazine Intro Page Click Here