Exploring the revision before you write anything down

While reading yesterday I discovered an interesting sentence attributed to the poet William Stafford from his journal writings. The entry in question reads: “I must explore the revision that happens before you write anything down.” Disappointingly, there weren't any added lines of his exploration on this subject.

What Stafford is alluding to can be considered in two different categories. One is the process of selecting exactly what you want to say and choosing the best words at that moment (certainly subject to change) before you actually write the complete thought upon a page. But there is another aspect that touches upon something I have blogged upon in the past that continues to confound me. It is what I refer to as “self censorship” and while it can be very controlled and directed by the writer, I wonder about the less obvious possibilities as they might relate to the revision that takes place in the mind before reaching the page.

When driving and approaching an intersection with traffic signal, the mind makes decisions that are split second and we don’t seem to be totally cognizant of the process. We know for example what the color signals of the light mean, but coming upon a yellow light there is something that happens quickly to inform us of our decision ahead of applying the breaks or perhaps more gas. It all happens so quickly there seems not the internal banter going on in the brain that you might experience in writing a first line upon a page, where there may be significant forethought that is very transparent. Afterwards, you may be able to recount to another, “I chose this word over that because…” The process of reaching your decision seems retraceable.

Going through the yellow signal or not is likely tied to some internal understanding if fear. Fear of what might or might not happen. I assume there is an assessment of perceived risk, but it happens so quickly we don’t seem to be aware of the data-in and the data-out that makes up the final decision.

I think all writers have safe zones and danger zones to their writing. It may be subjects or it may be images we don’t feel comfortable putting into words. Staying within our comfort zones is of course very limiting. We may find our subject matter tends to repeat. Our choice of vocabulary could become so common that all our work starts to fall into the same tone.

If we perceive danger and make split second decisions on the road, do we do the same with word or subject choices before we commit those thoughts to the page based upon our own preconceived notions as what is safe to write and what is not safe? Do we self censor without real cognitive choice?

Writing reveals us to readers in ways that become exceedingly personal. There is some degree of risk associated with everything we write. The risk we'll look silly. The rick we'll me misunderstood. The risk that everything we write suggests that we've experienced what we've written or that what we write is how we feel about something. Keep in mind that we are the first readers of our own work. Sometimes we may be startled by our own writing. I have no idea if any of this occurred to William Stafford in pondering the mental revision before we commit to page but it is a discussion I would love to have had with him.

We are what we are

"Poets are jails. Works are the convects who escape."

~ Cocteau, diary

July 4th

A shrill followed by a cornless pop!
Dogs retort like a report’s echo
and I’m so glad to be and American
but I forgot my flag pin

you will forgive me, yes?
There’s a beer in the cooler—
made in America (a foreign corporation
wants to by) I’ll have one too.

A rocket’s red glare lights the sky
over my neighbor’s roof
but he’s been doing peach gigglers
since late afternoon

and “oh shit, hope their house is okay”
is all he can say…

The Boss is blaring on speakers.
Makes you almost want to cry

out loud the way some people sing off key
but are the only ones who don’t know it.

Giggler guy just ran by in his wife's thong
as the sky lights him up
like-a-strobe-light.

Coffee...

Last night as I stood on our deck you just knew it was coming. Hand noting to do with my joints or aches, but rather the speed and magnitude of the clouds and how they were accessorized in gray.
Indeed, a thunderstorm followed.

This morning, the eastern sky is ablaze in sun.
I have an eye exam this morning. If they dilate my eyes I'll be blinded in this sun.

The first time I went to this eye doctor there were these two little gray haired ladies raving about how the office has the best coffee. Damn if they weren't right. It makes me look forward to going. If only dental offices served coffee like this.

Mary Oliver has such a way with words...
"About poems that don't work - Who wants to see a bird almost fly?"

A Voice of Our Own

Evidently Earth has a voice in space. According to astronomers, Earth emits an ear-piercing series of chirps and whistles that can be head in a recording here.

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"Today I am altogether without ambition. Where did I get such wisdom?" ~ Mary Oliver

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Unconscious Mutterings ~ link

Word & Thought Associations

here's mine:

Loneliness :: Empty
Traffic :: Cop
Chaos :: Fire drill
Burp :: Baby
500 :: Indy 500
Movie :: Karma
Coma :: Sleep
Bark :: Dog
Stare :: Down
Angelina :: Jolie

Therapy on the page

What do Latinos, poetry and therapists all have in common? They are all a part of Daniel Cubias' latest blog post on The Huffington Post. It's pretty funny.

It's said that one can observe Rumi poetry in many of Elham Moaidnia's paintings. Here is an article about her exhibition in Dubai as well as a look at the work of this Iranian born artist at her own web site.


"Poetry tries to bridge abyss lying between the name and the thing. That language is a problem is no news to poets." ~ Charles Semic

I'll tell you a secret.... I have a hang-up about poetry.

I sit here with my mind somewhere else... I'm thinking, can I be certain the lawn doesn't shrill in anguish at the sound of a mower? Okay, seriously I'm really thinking about the existence of words without sound. They don't require sound do they? Of course not... I'm plotting them out here on the computer and there is no sound, save for the clicking of the keys and you can't distinguish the sound I made for and from you.

When I was in high school our Latin teacher referred to Latin as a written language as opposed to a spoken language. I'm imagining if today English were strictly a written language how different communication would be. Certainly less spontaneous.

Poetry readings would take on a whole new meaning. Imagine a poet walking into a room of eager poetry consumers. Theater style seating. The poet passes out sheets of paper to the some 25 to 30 people who showed up. Then he stands back and watches the non-verbal reactions to what is read, and imagines what parts the people are reacting to and just what those reactions mean.

I don't suppose any of you are buying this scene. You probably are even questioning that we got more than two dozen people to any kind of poetry reading. Why am I even talking about this idea? Well, as much as I do enjoy doing readings (where I read aloud my own poetry) I am convinced that spoken word poetry still lacks something critical to language. That is to see the poem on a printed page. To see the words - the spaces between. The black and the white. The image and the lack of image and the whole visual that creates both. I guess simply put, I want all poetry to be viewed as concrete poetry. It's just a little hang-up I have.

Do you know how depressing it is...

to get to Starbucks with your journal and discover you got off without your favorite fountain pen that you always write with?

Poetry News in the Blogosphere

Shirley Dent expounds upon the place of poetry in China and contemplates a time down the road, when we're not just sitting up and "taking notice of China's economic dynamism but of its poetic and political vibrancy as well."

Janyne Pupek has two poems up at The Dirty Napkin. Yeah Jayne!

Two Seattlelites doing the unthinkable - Making a living from poetry.

Cindy has Thirteen Marriage Tips for Bibliophiles.

Joannie - Pull over and write a poem or What driving while talking on a cell phone has to do with poetry?

Blogging - is it worth it? Part two

Following my earlier post on Tuesday I've had additional time to reflect on this subject. In fact I was talking with a peer at a meeting on Wednesday night about this. This person, who is not a blogger, but reads my blog in her e-mail by way of a feed she subscribes to, acknowledged she agrees about the exposure to others people's work. It dawned on me during this conversation that there are many poets who develop close peer relationships for example, with people who go through an MFA program together, and find themselves connected to one another and their work for years after completing the program. For these people, the Internet becomes an extension of the peer contact from the MFA program itself. In spite of distance, it remains relatively easy to follow the work of others through this medium. Their network may start there and expand well beyond.

I've not had the benefit of the MFA experience. Certainly none of it, but for the sake of this conversation, the peer network that can develop as a result of it. I have a limited number of individuals, with varying degrees of writing experience, with whom I have face-to-face contact with locally. Clearly these people are important. Still, if left to these contacts alone, there is much I would miss in terms of my exposure to the poetry of today.

There are far more people with whom I've had contact than listed in the previous post. But six of those seven people have published work which I have copies of. The other one has a book (nudging myself) I still need need to acquire. Now in each of these cases it is not likely I would have just walked into store and bought their book. Not without other contact. Not without coming to know something about their work, their style, their voice.

Through blogging, I've met other poets from beyond the local community. I've learned more about some through interviews. Expanded my knowledge of contemporary and experimental work. Benefited from a variety of poetic voices. Increased my knowledge of available poetry markets, received exposure and yes, feedback on some of my own work. And last but not least, shared in triumphs and rejections. Writing, especially when it comes to poetry is very solitary. It often relies upon withdrawing deep into one's own self which can seem lonely and even dark at times. It's ameliorating when you are exposed to and can learn from other poets who know well that place and the process.

Blogging - is it worth it?

I've been exploring this morning the impact blogging has had on my life as a poet. Which has brought me to a realization that it is difficult to imagine it otherwise. For the sake of this post, I want to acknowledge that my reference to blogging includes not only my own, but the blogs of others that I read.

I could certainly write poetry without blogs. I have in the past. Certainly people were writing poetry before the advent of blogs. It seems to me that there are several areas that I could touch upon where blogs have had an impact on poetry for me personally.

There is exposure to other poets. This is a critical point for two reasons. There are other poets I may well never have made contact with were it not for blogging. Among contemporary poets, there are many extraordinary individuals writing today that I would likely not have been exposed to simply through libraries, local readings, or bookstores. This is not simply a matter of personal enjoyment of the works of others, but in some instances it includes email communication with others writing that have allowed me to network in a much broader circle then otherwise possible. And beyond enjoying the reading of poems by some of these individuals, I firmly believe that those who write MUST read.

Poetry bloggers provide fresh material on an almost daily basis. It is no substitute for reading the works of well established poets who are published, but by the same token, if I were limited to the pool of such poetry, I'd be missing a lot of very good material and in many cases newer subject matter or experimental work that I'd never find in a bookstore.

Through my own blogging, I've had people come my way just as I have been exposed to others. It is definitely a two way street with respect to networking. People have given me feedback that has been helpful.

There was a time when I was participating in two poetry groups and two additional writing groups. That was very time consuming. I've cut back in that area and have done so without sacrificing my exposure to others or their exposure to me by way of the Internet and my blogging.

Just to name a few individuals that blogging has brought me into contact with- whose work I might not have otherwise easily connected with:

• Ivy Alvarez
• Eileen Tobios
• Kelly Russell Agodon
• Jayne Pupek
• Christine Hamm
• Aleah Sato
• Jilly Dybka

Those are just a few that quickly come to my mind. I don't know that any one of those I would likely have come into contact with if it weren't for blogging. Perhaps Tobios, but probably not. Still, exposure to each of these individuals and their work has been invaluable to me and the progression of my poetry writing. Clearly if someone would ask, I'd have to say the blogging experience has been worthwhile.

Celebrate Books & Anniversary

Yesterday was our 34th wedding anniversary and among other things my wife and I did book store outing. Hey, it's like having your cake and eating it too! We always enjoy book stores. While it may not be reality based, Cathy and I are of the philosophy that books are a commodity that everyone should have available to them and that you should just have a no-limit card that can be used for books only. What a deal!

This morning I had a time set aside for a recording of four of my own poems. One or more of them will be part of a CD that is being made of some local poets. Then they will be available in September at two different events in the area. One at a library sponsored event and the other at The Writer's Place here in Kansas City. I felt like the recordings went well. I'll post more about the events soon.

The San Francisco Giants were in town for a four game series this weekend. We went to Friday nights game, a 9-4 win by the Giants. It was a great evening at the ballpark! Of course I'm an avid Giants fan so this was like heaven. Plus there was an awesome fireworks display afterwords. I shot some game pictures - when I gent then downloaded I'll post a couple.

Dodge Poetry Festival this September

The poets lineup for the 2008 Geraldine R. Dodge Poetry Festival is a full and varied sampling of poetic voices. CD Wright, Brenda Hillman, Coral Bracho, Robert Hass, Martín Espada,Franz Wright, Linda Pastan, Maxine Kumin, Naomi Shihab Nye, Jane Hirshfield, Taha Muhammad Ali, Ted Kooser, Mark Doty, Edward Hirsch, Chris Abani, Charles Simic, Joy Harjo, Lucille Clifton, Sharon Olds, and last but not least Billy Collins.

As many as 20,000 are expected in the historic Waterloo Village in Stanhope, New Jersey for the 12th biennial event which will run from Thursday, September 25 through Sunday, September 28, 2008.

Event tickets and other items are available at the online Festival Shop

Journal bits this past week

Poet at table

• A swatch of scalp lay silent/a plug of zoysiagrass/encroaching upon our sensibilities




• It was the summer of gas lines/so hot the legs of ants curled under




• ...How we stood/on the hill and cradled/our paranoia, keeping/to ourselves...

The Merit of following our own compulsions

The measure of artistic merit is the length to which a writer is willing to go in following his own compulsions. - John Updike

Your Privacy For Sale

Small wonder the Bush administration has insisted on immunity from prosecution for AT&T and other telecommunications that granted government access to private phone conversations and e-mails without due process or order from any court. The political action committee at AT&T contributed the maximum amount allowable by law to the Bush/Cheney campaign — twice.

CIA in the news....

• CIA rejects secret jails report
• CIA jails in Europe 'confirmed'
• UK apology over rendition flights
• US judge blocks CIA flight case - "The very subject matter of this case is a state secret," Judge James Ware wrote in a ruling.
• Inquiry into destroyed CIA tapes
• US 'may' use waterboarding again
• Doctors' Group Says It Has Evidence US Military Tortured Detainees

Sad but largely true...

What most persons consider as virtue,

after the age of 40 is simply a loss of energy. ~Voltaire

Thoughts on the Making of a Poem

Nick Laird is a young novelist and poet born in Northern Ireland who this past weekend had a piece in the Guardian about the physicality of language. He starts out:

"You should put that in a poem. A thing to say to the people who write
poems; the offering of some strange coincidence or anecdote. Poets if they are
like me, sip their drink and agree, privately certain it won't give rise to
anything at all."

Laird goes on... "You can make fiction and drama from reported stories, from hearsay and incident, but not poetry."

It is my own experience that words rather than a particular story do indeed tend to go much further towards the success of a poem. It's not that I have not tried the other approach, and likely will again (I tend to be stubborn like that), but it is the cohesive junction of a word and an image, or a word and a smell or some other word and sense linkage that is more likely to drive a poem forward than anything else I've found.

Lair also quotes Edward Thomas , the early 20th century English poet on the subject of what poetry is made of, "Anything, however small, may make a poem; nothing however great is certain to." The times I have sit down with pen and paper to specifically forge a poem on some grand storyline have almost always met with failure or disappointment on my own part.

Sometimes, I have found it helpful to lift a very short line from another poem or sentence of some other type of work and use it to start a new poem. I try to let those few words allow some image to direct me forward with what I am putting on the page. Later, the opening line can be dropped, just as any of the the rest of the work can be modified and rewritten any number of times. I find it's just a really good way to jump start a poem into being.

So I tell myself here that I need to resolve that I am going to stop trying to force something into being. I must periodically remind myself of this. I do it here, once again. Sigh.

Tim Russart

Tim Russert came on the scene as a television journalist back when I was still very involved in Democratic Party politics on a daily basis. Russert became a Sunday staple that I turned to for insightful coverage of the political landscape and governmental issues as well. For those entrenched in politics, he was an essential. Indeed it can be said that he grew in such prominence that one could argue that to get to the White House, you have to go through Russert. You had to be baptized into the litany of Meet The Press guests that Russert grilled. When my wife called me at the office yesterday and told me of Russert's death I could hardly believe it. Both my wife and I each morning tune into Morning Joe on MSNBC as we are getting ready for work each morning. One of the highlights is always the visit by Russert and his most recent take on the presidential campaign. I said to Cathy upon hearing the news, "Oh my God, he won't be here for the election." Indeed, it already feel like election night will be hollow.

I realized as I have thought about his sudden departure that there are aspects of Tim Russert that I will miss that transend his political analysis. For one thing, no matter how serious Russert was on the air, their was a genuine upbeat and personable quality about him that you so seldom see. His smile and laughter were almost trademarks of every apperance he made.

For many who are perhaps not as old as I am, the image today of TV journalism is so very different from what Russert served up on Meet The Press. It was not about glitter, it was not for show. It was not entertainment news in the context that so much of Cable News has become. There was an integrity that he maintained throughout his career that you don't generally associate with TV journalism elsewere.

Russert was a tough interviewer, but he was always fair and always dignified in his interaction with guests. There were certainly times when an interviewer would hang himself, but Tim Russert never kicked the chair out from under him. He always was in search of truth wherever it might lead and he was always willing to give his guests the benefit of the doubt and allow them to explain anything they felt was necessary.

This Presidential election campaign has already been a historic one. It's an election unlike any we've had before and it just doesn't seem right that Tim Russert will not be calling the states on election night.