Saturday check-in

I've been neglectful in blogging past week this largely due to feeling so drained by sinuse issues. Aside from work I've come home nightly with little energy left for anything else.

I've managed to get some reading done... little writing. Today I'm feeling better and a little optomistic though the energy levels are still at low tide.

In the senselessness of the Sandy Hook School tragedy combined with this dull sick feeling, it is even harder to keep from becoming frozen in dysfunction.

Duotrope in the New Year

Are you looking forward to the new year, dusting off this one - out with the old in with the new?  Not so fast...  Starting January 1, 2013 Duotrope - the writer market listing and submission tracking service will no longer be available free.  Of course as it has been said many times about many things, nothing is really free.  Duotrope has operated since inception without charge. It has encouraged users to make contributions towards operating expenses and utilized a color coded warning system not unlike the old homeland security threat system. This told users if they were on track, running short, or warning Will Robinson things are dire.

All the good stuff that is Durotrope is no longer going to be available to users unless they ante up. Now I could say, "Damn, why didn't people support it?" But I am, case in point perhaps a reason for the downfall. Yes, I have contributed to it, but not often enough.

Now, I've seen one blogger post that this has caused a major uproar among writers and that many are saying  they will do without the service before they will pay to use it. Of course that's a choice we can all make.  If I was only submitting work two or three times a year I'm sure I could live without it. I did see one writer on Facebook objecting to the pay model that if they charged everyone $50 to use Facebook there would be mass exodus. I don't disagree, but I've never felt I could live would Facebook and I would not pay $50 to be on it. But this is apples and oranges.

Durotrope has been a top notch site in my opinion and further, they have made major upgrades to it in recent times. Only time will tell, but I'm planning on submitting a lot of work in 2013 and I'm going to need the service.

Confession Tuesday - Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Edition

It's Tuesday again and so I've come here tonight to offer up my weekly confession. Shall we start?


Dear Readers:

It's been two newly purchased poetry books, a new pair of shoes, and one contract from a publisher to sign since my last confession a week ago.

I confess that while I was about 25 minutes late leaving the office tonight I was not ready for the fact that it was well on the way to being dark downtown. It just seemed so different then last night when I left.  I mean Monday night It was still light when I arrived home and this was like spooky different. I don't mean that I was afraid or anything like that, it was just strange how different it felt. The drive home was not especially smooth.  Traffic on I-70 played with my patience. I did not let it get the best of me though.

As I noted above I got two new poetry books this week. They are Factory of Tears, by Valzhyna Mort and In Broken Latin, by Annette Spaulding-Convy. (have more to say soon about these books) I truly am giddy when I get a new poetry book. Especially if it's one that I have had my radar on for a while. You have book radar don't you? I confess that I'm forever wanting this book or that book and usually several at a time. I just can't ever quite satisfy my thirst for books. I'm pretty sure that if you look in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) there is a code for people who can't own enough books.

I got a contract from a publisher this week. Don't wet your pants! It's not for a book but for a single poem. I confess that in all the time I've written poetry and had work accepted and published there has never been a written contract involved. Of course there has never been any money involved either.

This past week I've been exhausted every night by the time I've gotten off work. My work can be pretty intense, even stressful at times but since we've added a new case management program, I'm working in it essentially all day long. It's very labor intensive so I get to the end of the day and I've like done all this work and maybe moved two items off my desk. I know there is value to the case management program but I confess that I have a tendency to look at how far I've gotten into my work load and it can be depressing.

Slowly but surely I've been working on a manuscript. I confess that I've not written like I should have this past week. Gotten off my schedule and been more miss then hit. Otherwise my days have leveled out. Not a lot of great days but much fewer bad days. I confess I'll accept that  this time of year.

Amen!

~ Book of Kells: Holiday Gift Guide: Poetry Book Edition (even if you don't write poetry, you can read poetry)

~ Book of Kells: Holiday Gift Guide: Poetry Book Edition (even if you don't write poetry, you can read poetry)


Excellent gift ideas from Kelli Russell Agodon.  There are a couple on this list that I'm craving after her post.

Wondering

Did the dead thump of the head
to the concrete floor
so many years ago
have any repercussion

I should know of
or would I recognize
anything beyond
the usual
as unusual

Valzhyna Mort - Mid-West Poets Series

After work last night I headed to The Mixx for dinner. It was a grueling day and I had not eaten lunch. A Mixx salad sounded like just what I needed and I had a but of time to kill before heading over to Rockhurst for the Midwest Poets Series reading by Valzhyna Mort.

I've miss the last couple of MW Poet Series readings but this one I've had on my radar. I first heard about Valahyna Mort in a Poets & Writers magazine maybe three years ago or so.

Valzhyna started her reading in  Belarusian her native tongue. While not able to understand - the words had a familiarity. I too two years of Russian in high school and while I have retained little of the Russian the sounds were quite similar and I found the sharpness and the harshness of the language amazingly comforting. Her speech is soft but powerful. Her writing too shows a powerful command of language. These two components are interesting given the fact that she approached the microphone with just a bit of shyness maybe trepidation.

In Belarusian I  as in other of her poems she blends a sociopolitical landscape into her work and does it well...

"even our mothers have no idea how we were born
how we parted their legs and crawled out into a world
the way you crawl from the ruins after a bombing"

In one poem in memory of a book, I can tell you that everyone around me was hanging on to every word.

Valzhyna  is a small woman of physical proportions but her poetic voice has strength and resonance. In her book Factory of Tears there is a  line that makes me think of her...

"i'm
as thin
as your
eyelashes"

I've been in need of an Artist's date and this was reading was just what I needed.


Additional biographical information:
Valzhyna Mort - Wikipedia 

A video clip (August 2008 in Brooklyn)

Confession Tuesday - Bitch Slap Edition

Dear Readers:

It's been a week since my last confession, but today has seemed like a week. Let's begin...

I realized this morning while in route to work that I had neglected to get my Healthy Choice TV dinner out of the freezer. I decided that I would just have to go out for lunch today and that was that.  It's not really as big a deal as it sounds. I've done it many times, jut not lately. The cafeteria at the Federal Building down the way isn't bad... I mean food wise. I can usually find something to suit me, but not always the healthiest.  Once a pretty reasonable price I confess that I'm less crazy about their prices these days and this is part of the reason I've been trying to bring lunch most of the time these past few weeks.

My morning was pretty busy and I was planning originally not to eat till 1PM (that was before I forgot my lunch) but as it reached the noon hour it occurred to me that if I wait till one o'clock the cafeteria at the Fed Bldg would be shutting down. So about 12:20 as I was getting ready to leave I made the mistake of taking a call rather then letting it go to voice mail.  This call turned out to be important and I remained involved in the call till about 12:45.  Then after a rest room stop (I know, too much detail) I realized there was no point in going to the Federal Building to eat. So I dug out some grapes I had in the refrigerator and that became my lunch.

I confess that I did pretty good for not eating a real lunch. I think in large part to the fact that the rest of my day was even busier then the first half. I confess that my office upon arrival was hotter then hell. I sought some relief from facilities management (they arrived about 4:45PM) and I confess that is was good that I was so busy because I normally get really cranky when it's hot. Keeping busy helped me push through the day without inflicting heat rage upon my co-workers. I turned on a fan I have and it mostly blew hot air around.

My day might not have been quite so tedious if I had not have to keep screwing with disappearing drivers and files on my computer. I confess I was starting to take it personally until I realized this problem was impacting others in our office. By the time I was ready to go home... I confess I WAS READY TO GO HOME.

One the commute traffic on I-70 became backed up due to a wreck. I realized then that impatient Mike was along for the ride. Yes we are closer then you might imagine but I'm not at all proud of him. Hell he even gets impatient with me! So, I'm driving along and I realize the problem up ahead and while Mike is getting upset I rationalize that no matter how bad a day I'm having, I'm pretty sure whoever is in the wreck is having a worse day. I confess this is where I bitch slapped impatient Mike and told him to count his blessings.

Well, I have arrived home. This is good. I getting my confession out of the way early. This too is good. Did I  mention that  on the way home my Chiropractic office called to cancel my appointment for "trigger points" tomorrow evening due to illness?  No worry, I could be the one sick.

Best to everyone!